Wow, what a past few days for you! I know you're seeing this too, but it's obvious from the outside that H is really seeking the comfort of old patterns because he's feeling very off-balance right now. He's got tough changes to make and hard work to do, and if his meds are off he's probably very anxious that he won't be able to come through.
One thing I really admire you for is not letting yourself slide back into your own unhealthy mindset to make it easier to stay in the comfort of your R. You have fought so hard and done so much work on yourself that you deserve to go through life with the emotional health you've been creating. When H is off-kilter he tries to pull you back into the arena where your R has previously existed because he doesn't want to feel threatened. Unfortunately, I don't think there's anything positive you can do to help him. You have to stay healthy until he believes the only path to an R with you is to pull himself up to where you are. That's tough on you and requires a lot of will power. And though you vacillate a little bit in your posts, you always end up back where you're centered, and you know what you have to do. So my main purpose in posting this is to tell you that you're doing great! I wish it was easier and more fun to do the right thing. It doesn't seem like doing the right thing should make you sad. But in the end doing the right thing always gets you the best result (or else it would be called "screwing up"!).
So stay strong and keep letting H deal with his own issues with your loving support.
Good luck!
Stop WaitingFeel EverythingLove AchinglyGive ImpeccablyLet Go
