So, I guess you are saying that wanting to do the right things, being nice, avoiding conflict, rescuing BB when she feels like life short changed her is not helping our situation very much. I agree.
yes but these are ingrained habits, so they are hard to change. easy to understand sometimes, but when the script is deployed we go on automatic reaction.
OG, I would like to suggest that you just take the dogs for a walk yourself. Say I am taking the dogs out, are you coming. Or I am taking the dogs for a walk at 3:30, come with me. (tonality is important. statement not demand, not pleading. be indifferent to the outcome.) then drop it and do it. If you have three say I would like you to handle 1 of them.
make sense? its not a demand, but it isnt supplicating either.
Another way to do this is to go to the Mall if you have one nearby, there is always something to talk about and you can walk around where its warm since winter is coming. Some malls even schedule this type of thing.
