"I have no doubts about your love for your wife, or your desire to make a great marriage. I dont see anything you say here as bashing her. vent away. you cant live with em, you cant hunt em."
I'm glad to hear you say that. I do want to be able to say whatever is on my mind, I think it is cathartic and allows me to better examine and correct my problems. But I never want to give the impression that I think the W is a bad person. She is an absolutely awesome person. If she was not such a good person, I would have left a long time ago. I don't think I would have the strength as some of the people on this board do to live with a person who denies sex, affection, and is vituperative. The wife is disconnected right now, which is hard for me, but I couldn't stand constant bickering, at least not without the make-up sex afterwards.
"One thing you might want to do is print out or save your first thread, there was a lot of good advice in there, and as you go thru this I think you will start to understand some of it even more."
Already have. In fact I have made a series of word documents separating out the tidbits into things to talk about with the C, things to try with the W (at the right time), etc.
"Try to keep the wild hairs to yourself when you feel like running in and doing, trying, fixing things RIGHT NOW, because "OH I GET it now type thinking." It will come off as insincere, not trustworthy, unstable, and after awhile, predictable. Stable is good, predictable is bad, bad, bad for attraction."
That is one of the reasons why I have been responding with OKs and processing. I am trying not only to have a conversation with you guys about this, but also display openly how I am handling the information. It is not just information that is important, it is what you do with it.
Dr. Glob of Dust
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
