"I've got my wine and M&M's in front of me so life is good again"
What a combo!

"Desperate Housewives is on tonight. Guilty pleasure."
Can't watch shows like that. Remind me too much of the hot sex I am missing. I end up watching mostly horror movies. Loved "The Grudge", "The Ring" and their Japanese versions.

"Might as well wait out the one year with no fault."
Sounds like it. I have never really thought about divorce or the legal ramifications. I have no idea what the statutes are in my state. Don't really want to know.

"Now that I've put you to sleep, I'll move on"
No no, I found that interesting. I always like to learn.

"I know this is where you struggle because you have a much faster pace than your W right now but hopefully she will catch up."
I tend to have a faster pace than most folks. I've had to learn to slow down to accomodate students, but I still sometimes go at the speed of light if not checked. I've got to learn to do the same when it comes to personal issues that involve other people. Especially since this is perhaps the most important issue in my life.

"So we have some faults, at least we have each other to keep each other in line. Sort of."
Agreed! I'll try to remember to post here before I do something really drastic and get feedback before jumping in. Won't happen everytime, sometimes the water is just too inviting, but even a few times will help.

"Don't ever be afraid to give me advice. It doesn't mean I'm going to take it"
WHAT! You don't immediately apply everything I say to your actions?!? NOOOOOOOO!

"Am I doing the right thing? Why am I even trying to make this work? It can't be just about the kids. Will he up and leave again? Will I?!? UGH."
So you do understand the ping-pong match that goes on inside my head. Back and forth at lightning speed. UGH only begins to describe it.

"Find ways to either vent your feelings or escape your feelings. It will help while waiting for the W to get on board so to speak."
I am trying, but there are so many triggers. For me, one of the main issues is the lack of not only hot sex, but sex itself and affection. EVERYWHERE you look these days in the media, sexuality is emphasized. It just reminds me of what I am missing.

"Sure, you won't be shot down but I'm sure you are afraid that your own resentment will hit a breaking point and if you don't try anymore that means YOU don't care anymore. Then where is the M? Total detachment on both ends. That's where H and I were right before the separation. Neither one of us were really making any efforts anymore to work on the EC, the SL, anything. At least you can bring this all up in MC. "
Very true words, and somewhat ominous. Fortunately, I did see some signs of life today after I posted. She actually sat in my lap once after I asked and then later that evening snuggled up against me without me asking. She still had her arms crossed while snuggling, but it was a start. We both promptly fell asleep.

"Do you not believe that she wants you anymore? Loves you? Does she say she loves you even if she doesn't act like it? Has she brought up OW at all? If I were her I would be asking a lot about it I would think. "have you talked to her?" all that stuff."
I don't know. Sometimes I wonder, but then she will act like she did tonight and I am unsure again. I think snuggling up against me is a long way from "wanting" me. Sometimes I cannot feel any love from her, other times I feel a little bit. She rarely says I love you without it being a response to me saying it. She never says it spontaneously. She has not brought up OW at all except for one question in the past week basically asking if she was still involved in the project we were working on.

"I'm a freak of nature!"
Agreed!!!!

"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"

Inertia Creeps by Massive Attack