I saw H briefly this afternoon. I hugged him from behind and told him he forgot to get his booty this am. He told me he had to go in to work. He was painting a RC car body and having trouble with it. He also told me he had trouble at work with an engine job. So, he was acting flustered.
I know that I do this distancing thing from him. After so many weeks of feeling close(r), I start to feel anxious and start thinking negative things about him. For example, I start thinking about how he lied to me and wondering if he is using internet porn again (esp. since we are "separated.") HOWEVER, he acts SOOO excited when he is with me ML!!! So, I think that obviously, the internet solution can't nearly be as good as the in person connection. It's like I can't overcome this barrier of trust. I am so afraid to trust him. I always have been and he didn't do anything to cause me not to trust him in the beginning.
He told me he had to go in to work. He was painting a RC car body and having trouble with it. He also told me he had trouble at work with an engine job. So, he was acting flustered. 