KDK, Kismet and BB, thanks guys you really are so good.
KDK, I know what you mean about hearing about the OW. On one hand you don't want to hear a thing about her but on the other you do want to know if they are having any contact. It is a damned if you do and damned if you don't scenario. It's like you want to trust them but it is hard to and I guess that takes time and they have to learn that the trust has to be earned back. Nobody said it was going to be easy...sigh....It does help knowing someone else feels the same though so thanks KDK....
Kismet, yes it feels right at some points but boy can it be awkward. This is unknown territory for me so I am trying to tread carefully. I am still hoping we can get it all back on track but that remains to be seen. I guess all I can say is if it doesn't work out at least this time it would more than likely be a mutual decision, which I think would be easier to handle but one day at a time and fingers crossed
My beloved BB, thankyou for pointing out to me to keep my dignity and no matter what still be who I truly am. I struggle with this a little, as I want H to see that I am prepared to try and make sacrifices but need to remind myself to only make changes that feel comfortable and that can be stuck to and not to say I can if I know it goes against who I am or what I believe as that will only lead to disaster.
I am trying to be open and honest with H about things that matter in how I am feeling and this communication will take a bit of work as I am a talker and H isn't. The one thing I do when I ask him how he feels about something is gently remind him that one of his problems with our M was that I didn't take his opinions seriously and that I am trying to now but that if he doesn't tell me what he thinks I have no way of knowing.
This will take some time to develop and alot of patience on my behalf as words do not come easy to H. I am DBing my butt of I can tell you but I am also trying hard to not sacrifice who I am in the process.
You are right BB, I feel alot stronger these days and although it would hurt alot if this didn't work out, I am partly prepared for it and believe I would deal with it alot better than previously.
Now what did you mean about being BOLD not sure if that is good or bad. I know I can be a bit direct but I am very caring of other's feelings or at least I hope I come across that way. You see I look at BOLD as being rather loud and arrogant, which whilst I can be loud at times, I wouldn't say I was arrogant or I hope not as I don't respond well to arrogant people myself.
Just taking each day as it comes and can I just say this is it's own mini rollercoaster and at times I just get sick of riding them. (Funny I actually love the real variety). Aaaheem....I hope you all have a good weekend, I am having a long one (4 days Sat, Sun, Mon and Tues). This is due to Tuesday being "Melbourne Cup Day" and we are shutting my office on Monday so I am looking forward to that, oh and Daylight Savings starts here on Saturday night or Sunday morning whichever way you want to look at it so now it will not get dark until between 8.30 - 9.00pm. I love Summer......KDU
