I had a great overnight stay with S6 last night. These midweek overnights are a nice new development. XW called early, but we must have been doing s/t noisy (boisterous superhero play? ) b/d it went to VM. She called later and when I answered, she thanked me w/ excitement and happiness re her first run in the running shoes I got her. I said "That's great!" and she went on to talk about her run in some detail. Nice, simple positive exchange. In the past, even in the M, I may have downplayed my role with the gift, noting S6 as 'choosing them' or s/t like that. This time I more maturely said that I thought of her, knew she might like them, and wanted her to have more pleasant runs.
She's still reeling a bit from whatever R or Rs she had in the summer. This felt like a key time to check in with some kindness, not as a cold calculated manipulation, but merely as a loving but safe gesture to someone I care about. The key seemed to be to have very low expectations, but to be true to myself while doing so.
I'm still working on the controlling part of myself, but this was a nice 'no-strings-attached' event that reflects change for me.
) b/d it went to VM. She called later and when I answered, she thanked me w/ excitement and happiness re her first run in the running shoes I got her. I said "That's great!" and she went on to talk about her run in some detail. Nice, simple positive exchange. In the past, even in the M, I may have downplayed my role with the gift, noting S6 as 'choosing them' or s/t like that. This time I more maturely said that I thought of her, knew she might like them, and wanted her to have more pleasant runs.
