It's good to hear from u again! I'm glad that u and your hubby are still on the right track to working on your M.
I'm now back in Calgary with our son...been back since mid-Aug ( H still in Taiwan ). It has been such a relief getting out of the hell i was experiencing while pregnant and then as a first time mommy. But i get back and H starts with the phone calls...he wants to reconcile ( apparently OW is now gone ). Anyways the whole story is on my thread but what i wanted to touch on is the 'whispering' you are talking about.
Well pretty much everyone back here in calgary knows what has happened with me and H ( those people of the same ethnical background ). Everyone's giving me the survivor speech, you'll move on to someone better etc and it sucks hearing that b/c they have written H off completely. My father says he has nothing ever to say to him again...he will not exchange one word with him, brother says f*** him...only my mother says he would have to change his ways, move back to canada and prove himself back into the family. But now H wants to reconcile and besides the million other things that need to be sorted out with us...then there are family and friends on top of it.
i'm quite tired of the gossiping about my sitch. H wants me to come back to taiwan which i dont want to but if i gave the chance H is asking for...how could we possibly work on our M here with the pressure of Family ( H and i have no home here, and i'm back living with my parents...where would H live while we got money together for our own place?)
So PLW i totally understand where u are coming from. U have gotten great advice but with so many other things in our sitches...it's all easier said than done. It's really hard to hear people talk about your H when this is someone u still have feelings for, despite what they may have done. It's hard to hear it especially when you're holding a child u both created and people feel the need to bash the father in front of you ( regardless of what happens with me and H i do not want anything negative spoken to our son about H...if we end up divorced then one day our son may ask H what happened...but i dont want others butting in with their opinions ).
Anyways..I cant offer any advice, but I can just say that i know where u r at. And it sucks. It really surprises me the nerve of some people to just lay it all out in the open ( i've also had people that supported H and I , went to our wedding...that are now saying they always knew he was no good....nice huh? )
Anyways, take care and stay strong. We'll all eventually survive this and pretty soon it will be old news to everyone and they'll move on to the next gossip story...it's sad but true.
