Wow! I got a response. Thanks so much! I appreciate the advice. I guess it is a toss up whether or not I should tell him that I read the emails. That is what is annoying--when they tell you something, and you know it is a lie.
I see the point of not saying something if it is only going to hurt the other person, but to say, "at least we don't have to deal with an affair." Ohhh!
I am leaning towards going to counseling before remarrying and then putting everything out on the table if the counselor thinks it is a good idea.
It helps to hear people say that their spouse also told the OW the same things they used to tell you in their relationship. It was like my magic bubble was burst. I saw the things he said to me over the years as manipulative once I read that. I have done a lot of forgiving and try to just see him as human and someone who makes mistakes. That keeps me from wanting to choke him.
That is a really cute idea about the binoculars. I already thought of another gift though, and I am just about to mail it right now. I would have taken your binocular idea for sure. That is so great!! I knew someone out there had a great idea like that. I am writing that one in my day planner for the future. Thanks!
