Well, I agree with needing to do things for myself and getting myself happy. H is back to his mean ways towards me ...trying to find fault in anything that I do...even the way I made a sandwich. He is back to going to the bar at least three days a week coming to the house between 12 midnight and 4 in the morning.
I was speaking to my cousin who is like my best friend and she says exactly what all of you say too. She also said that she is sick of seeing me try so hard and not getting anything in return. She said that she likes my H but that he is and a$$. I was also told that if I can leave this marriage behind she thinks that I will be suprised that one day a man will treat me wonderful and give me compliments...I just dont know what I would do.
I was hoping to try and make it through the holidays but it doesn't look like it is going to happen. I want to be happy next year...I want Hannah to know that life is Wonderful. Although Hannah does not see us argue..I am sure that she sense it.
I know that I am a great person and that I deserve better but I just need to start working on my strengths to be able to do something about it. I need to realize that I am not the failure in this relationship and that I have given my all. This is one rollercoaster that I am getting sick of riding on. Why am I so afraid to do anything about it.
Questions I ask myself although I know that I will never know the answers.... 1)Why did he have a change for the worse...(getting mean...never like that before) 2)Why did he have the affair...
Why do I love someone so much and sacraficing my heart for him.
