At a very deep level, I am pissed off that I have spent the last 3 years trying to get our marriage back on track without a greater level of success than we currently have. Come on, Honeypot! You're supposed to be a role model for the new folks like me 3 years with progress that is still not good enough. I've only been at this again a few months and I cannot imagine 3 years! Sorry, no optimisic advice. Just wanted to express my empathy for you.