"You know, we'd probably have a much easier time having sex if you'd sit next to me. Starting tomorrow I want you to sit next to me, after the kids go to sleep." Oooh...that's Hot. Confident. Sexy. Good for MrH! It is like a series of one night stands several times per week. I found that an interesting way to put it. Sorry the EC is not there yet.
Sorry, don't have advice since I am in somewhat of a similar predicament. I'll be watching for others ideas though.