I slipped this weekend. Things were going well and then when I was left alone in the home, I started snooping. Wrong, I know, but hey, I'm a woman and that's what we do (or at least some of us). Anyway, I didn't find anything but it sent my H into semi- depression. He said he didn't blame me but he though we were beyond this. He also said each time I do something like that, it reminds him of his shame and guilt. He further said, he has lost everything! I told him not everything, he didn't lose me. But he said, yes he did, maybe only a part of me, but the most important part. He said that sometimes he thinks the best thing for me would be for him to get out of my life so that I can heal. I feel so sorry for us, we love each other, we truely do, but we're having such difficulty getting past our own individual pains and suffering. What can we do as a couple? We are in counseling as you all know and of course things have improved since we started this journey. But the road sometimes seems so challenging that we would be crazy to even try to take it. I guess sometimes my H and I grow weary. As much as we want us to work out, it seems at times that it is too hard. I know the alternative is harder, but good grief, this reaaly kicks us square in the teeth. This is a siutation that should have never happened. Not to us, we were and still are very much in love. How in the hell did this happen to us?
