I dont know what to say. Some things I was wrong about, which is fine. Some things bother me so much I dont want to offer more R help.

But that isnt what I was really doing anyways, so I hope the physical abuse is gone and stays gone.

I just basically decided to leave anger of other issues in my relationship outside my bedroom door.

well that is a pretty strong thing to do.

you could remember every persons name that you ever had sex with. Because it was more then just sex. Yet recently you stated that you could not recall the name of a person you were in a long term relationship with off the top of your head. Hmmm

No I said everyone I ever talked to about this. And I remember her/her face when asked or its brought up, but after years of locking down my head, it took a while to recall. x will be the same. an archived memory.

Physical fear of my own well being brought me back
dont know what to say, so..... nothing. I hope it ceases.

while not revolting to my stomach when uttered.
When you say this it comes off as there is nothing about him that pleases you. is that true? Do you appreciate or respect any aspect of his personality, or physical attribute?

hmmm his tools laying in my driveway and what pray tell is he using those tools for? and fishing sounds like GAL to me.

I usually only eat once a day. I get hungry around 3. If I wait until dinner time. Between 6-7 I am no longer hungry

Ok skinny minny. That is ridiculous. and may be part of your depression. Since you are disconnected from your feelings eat anyways. as a family would be good. It will create a habit in you if you can do it more then 45 days straight. Of course you arent hungry if you eat at 3. <head shaking>

it did not work out well. I think you should 'make' it work. Unless it is or becomes negative.

I do not like smoking pot or taking pain medicines I do not like the way it makes me feel it is disarming and sets me off balance.

Well even though I said it before I guess I will spell it out. I dont do drugs, legal or not. Ok aspirin, and alcohol. Not even caffine. Not even pain meds in ER after MC accident. I was joking to Lil.

Mental note jokes about sex ok. drugs and alcohol not.


Probably wont stop me.



ok thats it for now.

except hmmm, H is lazy for tree in yard. But house is screaming for Cleaning several days now. busted again.