Chrissy... My H and I were having a conversation about our dog that made me think of your detachment. Last yr my D was dying for a dog so for her b-day we took the plunge ( it was a special yr...her Bat Mitzvah...which we did a yr early for those of you still around who remember all this). Anyway, this dog is just the cutest, sweetest thing...but H and I are both not attached to her. We are good pet owners, but we don't have that connection...not because of anything to do with the dog. Like I said, she has the best disposition. I do enjoy watching the closeness my daughter shares with her...they have definitely connected and it's a great thing for my D. I was realizing that for my H and me, the dog really doesn't fill any need for us. We feel we did the right thing by getting the puppy, but there isn't anything we really get from her.
Now back to you...the situation between you and your H is much different...he has done lots of things to merit your detachment. However, I'm curious if you can think of ways in which you may need him. That's need, and not love, but the two are interconnected in a way, and it may get you started on some positive thoughts about the R.
I think it's great you are working on yourself---it took me several yrs of this before I could really address my marital stuff. I am just thinking of little ways to work on the marriage, if you so choose. As Lil has pointed out before, not every marriage is worth saving, but I guess I am on a marriage-saving kick to the nth degree.
