What do you have to lose at this point? From my POV, nothing...but you have a great deal to gain...no matter how the dice roll for you. Either you are happier (eventually) on your own...or you end up with a much more fulfilling M than you have now.
I think (Lil you're going to love this) that one thing many of us have in common is that we do have to get to the point of "my give a damn's busted!"....eventually you just reach a point that you can/will say do what you need to do.
My main point in pointing these things out to you though...is you've sat in this same spot for years....and you will continue to unless you reach catalystic point.
Zbube...you are dealing with a classic conflict avoider here...who has broken that pattern. It's not nearly so difficult for me now to tell my H what I need...where I stand...what will happen if he doesn't step up (and mean it). I guarantee you...if you will take those initial steps and do what you need to do, it will become easier for you too. Eventually you won't be afraid to say/do what you need to. The hardest part is taking those first steps...but I know you can.
