Yes, that is how I look at the question of "Why do I want to ML to someone who doesn't want to ML to me" also. I think it is a valid question as I know that my behaviors to achieve a SL with H range from valid, reasonable displays of desire all the way down to whining, cajoling insistence that he show me some sexual attention.
Well folks, I don't know about you but when you get to the point of basically "begging" it isn't good. So then, why do it? Why not just go off and mb? Why not just become celibate? Why not just hang out and wait until eventually, after a long while, H gets horny? Because. Because it isn't satisfying to me as a person. I can no more respect myself as a person when I accept the situation and leave the status quo than I can when I whine, beg or indeed manipulate.
Mrs. Nops question is also valid. However, I do know that my H wants to be married to me. I know this deep in my heart. Some sitch's here need to look at that question more than others. In my sitch, the fact that we both want to married to the other and for faith reasons are unlikely to leave gives both motivation to work on things and is demotivating depending. I will have to figure out how that all plays out.
ZB - sometimes your W reminds me of Mrs. Lou. You do have a respect problem here. Accept the animals you have, help with them. If another comes in the door - put it back out. It is time for you to have some decision making in this R too.
