At Least We Have A Plan

[arjnex]

(Previous threads here, here)

They say "time heals all wounds." Perhaps that's what's happening here.

Certainly, our various orthopedic issues are winding down. My leg is now out of its brace; my wife's foot has been surgically repaired, and is healing well, perhaps even better than expected. And, a few nights ago, she startled me...by bringing up the sex issue again.

It seems she was watching that show on Oxygen, Talk Sex With Sue Johansen, and Sue gave some advice to a couple who was in a similar situation to ours (i.e., not having had sex for years). She recommended a slow approach to re-establishing their intimacy. I didn't see this program for myself, but here's the idea, as related to me by my wife:

For the first couple of months, once a week, they would lie down together, naked, and just hold each other, no touching of naughty bits, not even kissing, for about 5 minutes per encounter. Then, the next two months, they would continue these encounters, but add ordinary, non-deep kissing to the mix. Then, for the following two months, they would continue, but now engaging in deep kissing. (If there were any stages involved beyond this, my wife didn't outline them.)

My wife suggested that we should try this technique, and she is willing to do so, starting in October. (This would give her the rest of this month to continue healing her foot and maybe squeeze in initial appointments with either a GYN or a psych, or both.) I have agreed; Sue Johansen is definitely an expert on the subject, and I'm willing to trust her judgement. My wife asked me if I would be able to handle this; I believe that I can.

Now, what I'm coming here and asking about is, has anyone here heard of this technique? (Maybe someone was watching that same program, and can provide further enlightenment, perhaps on details my wife or I didn't get?) What's your evaluation of the technique? And yes, I know some of you are probably thinking, "But, arjnex, doesn't that mean that it'll be next April before you even have the possibility of ML with your wife again?" Well, yes, but "next April at the earliest" is a whole lot better than "TBD," if you know what I mean. (And, no, I am not going to try to speed up the process. It's important for me to establish that I can hold back and just follow the process as outlined. Of course, if she starts feeling like accelerating the process, I would probably ask "Are you sure?" and then go along with her. But I'm not going to hold my breath waiting for that to happen.)

So, on the surface, not much has changed...but at least we have a plan. (Hence the new topic title.)

- "A"