Building Bridges

[cinemanymph]

It's official folks, I am married to a lunatic. Here's the latest. I had complete some introductory computer courses for work and it happened to take a hour and a half longer than my normal work hours (hour and a half overtime woo hoo). H called me on my cell to ream me a new one because I wasn't home. I was having trouble getting the puter to accept my answers for the tests, f***ing thing kept loging off in the middle of things, aaaarrrrghgghhhhh! So I was already frustrated when his call came. I tried to explain what was going on to him but he hung up on me. I didn't have the patience to deal with him. The longer I sat there with my malfunctioning puter and his nasty tone of voice ringing in my ears, the madder I got. I had worked up a real good mad on by the time I got home. This is the conversation that took place:

Me: Don't you ever call me at work and speak to me like that ever again. I don't know who you think you are taking that nasty tone of voice with me.
H: You were supposed to be here at five, you didn't even stop to think that I might have had plans.
Me: I didn't know you had plans, why didn't you tell me you had something you wanted to do this evening?
H: You didn't need to know.
Me: What?
H: You never think of what I might have going on.
Me: I was at work. I can't win with you, you b!tch because I am not working, then I get a job and you b!tch because I'm not home. What the h*ll do you want from me?
H: My life is so great here. I'm getting treated so well.
Me: Yeah, well it's been three weeks since we had an argument in which you said something so hurtful I can't believe it came out of your mouth, let alone entered your mind to say to me. You haven't brought it up, just left it hanging between us.

I have to put an aside here, because last weekend attended a wedding long enough away where we spent the night in a hotel (a very rare occurance of the two of us getting to spend a night alone). I couldn't be expected to ML to my H with the FIL argument hanging between us so I brought it up, saying the following:

Me: I think you are sorry for what you said to me (regarding FIL) but I'm not sure because you haven't said so. I don't know if you know how hurtful what you said is. My fear is that you will get angry again and say something just as hurtful maybe to one of the boys.
H: Maybe I should leave then.

Back to the shouting match from yesterday:

H: Oh, you mean about Dad?
Me: Yeah, that gem you uttered at me.
H: Well it's true you didn't check on him until I called and asked how he was and the boys were crawling all over him.
Me: I was in the basement with the kids trying to give FIL some privacy to start his day. You mean to tell me that I was negligent in some way, and disrespectful to boot?
H: Yeah, you were.
Me: I don't know if I want to stay married to a man who thinks such things about me.
H: (clams up and hasn't said a thing to me since)

I am ready to call a divorce lawyer. Does anybody here think that there is anything salvagable within this marriage? My friends and family have been telling me for years to leave him and I have been insisting that he is the father of my children and the man I promised to grow old with at the alter 10 years ago. Have I been wrong all these years?

Thanks for asking about my job, Chrissy. I have baked so many cookies, pies, breads, etc. that I can't even smell them anymore. I have been able to decorate a few cakes, but find that cake decorating is a very small part of my job.