I told him last night during our 15 minute talks that I needed him to back off from the living out the fantasy. I told him I understood the fantasy and him having it in his mind does not offend me or bother me. I have some pretty wicked fantasies of my own but they are just that. I told him that there are many other things I am willing to try to help him overcome the sexual issues he is having, just not that. I told him how badly he scared me the other night. What I thought was just a fun evening out turned out to be much more than I could handle. I used some of the advice that I have been given here by telling him that we need to focus on making things right between us and he needs to work on his own personal MLC issues before we do anything else to damage our relationship. We need to continue with our counseling and see what happens. Some days I feel like we take 3 steps forward then 2 steps back. Other days I feel like we take 2 steps forward and 3 back. I realize it is all about smalls wins, but this has definately been a situation that I think has undone some of our small wins. I guess we just try to move on from here and keep on going. I am so tired of the pain sometimes and I know this is a long process. I am just trying to figure out how to cope right now.
Its not about getting what you want, its about wanting what you already have.
