i hear you, i understand, to me, i felt i was living a permanent nightmare, sometimes could not breathe....... i know it is hard to put into action all the theory, but be patient and try things. important, start a journal, that will remind you of things, and will help you plan and execute. i dont want to be an as....... but you haave to get rid of your fear of pain. maybe that is the lesson... be firm, it will hurt, but try it, that is growing up. it is like when you throw yourself into the swimming pool, but later on you enjoy swimming. please, i am not trying to wreck your marriage or encouraging you to be a revolutiionary, but i felt sad reading that you were vulnerable and being enticed into something i know will not help your R. i am no expert, these are personal opinions............
