The following is my opinion and likely to aggravate you, make you defensive, start defending your actions and explain why the situation is or is not the way it is.
I consider you a friend, whether you wish this bestowed upon you, most of the restraining orders against me are still in effect. And I don't like to see you blinded to the reality.
You are deluding yourself. You are NOT divorced in your mind and have not acted as if you are divorced from her. Divorced people DO NOT call each other everyday or several times a day, invite each other to lunch, dinner, ice cream, to walk the dog, go to the park, show up univited to your house, have complete access to your house, do laundry, use your computer, clean your house, eat your snacks, let their children spend the night with you.
You are still convinced, (despite your giving yourself the "friends" and I know we are divorced speech) keeping her close and spending inordinate amounts of time together will ressurect the relationship.
You are deathly afraid of what happens if she gets out of your orbit. Afraid she will find someone else or something else to occupy her time; time she would not be spending with you.
There is honestly nothing to keep you guys connected. And you are afraid if any of that connection is severed.
You are, despite wanting to believe otherwise, impatient. But I also know you are good guy and I wonder if you really have convinced yourself you are over and divorced.
We want nothing but the best for everyone here and success stories and for us to be with the people we love, but I don't think you want to or can continue in the manner you are, "being friends" and holding onto your unspoken "fantasy."
Quote: Please. Who do you think you are talking about? A fellow Venusian? Don't kid yourself T, guys are not that perceptive. He doesn't get any "vibes". He doesn't even look for them.
Nice one, Wes.
I would continue this debate, as there are a LOT of comments going through my mind over guys not 'getting it' but it's really been a long day. Just saying, I don't agree w/you, and we will cont this another time!
t/c friend,
T
Quote: You are deluding yourself. You are NOT divorced in your mind and have not acted as if you are divorced from her. Divorced people DO NOT call each other everyday or several times a day, invite each other to lunch, dinner, ice cream, to walk the dog, go to the park, show up univited to your house, have complete access to your house, do laundry, use your computer, clean your house, eat your snacks, let their children spend the night with you.
I kind of agree with this. I think you're telling yourself you're just friends, but I'll bet you still have that little guy whispering in your ear about how great it'll be when you finally win her back.
Update: The Keith Urban concert was awesome and as expected there was a predominance of females. I commented on the tattoo on the back of the girl in front of me and she lifted the back of her shirt and pulled down the back of her jeans so I could appreciate it better. I had fun, the boys seemed a little more so-so about it, but they didn't know many songs. Here's the inspirational message I took from the concert.
Quote: Someday I'm gonna run across your mind Don't worry, I'll be fine I'm gonna be alright While you're sleeping with your pride Wishing I could hold you tight I'll be over you And on with my life
So take your records, take your freedom Take your memories I don't need'em And take your cat and leave my sweater 'Cause we have nothing left to weather In fact I'll feel a whole lot better But you'll think of me
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
