Qoe may be right about him. I'm not sure. He seems far less confident than you as a person, hesitant if you would.
I see a different pattern with this OW2 vs his behavior with OW1. He was a beast to you in terms of consideration of your feelings within that first R, but in this one - although still acting unacceptably, I seem glimmers of empathy and care for you. Almost makes me wonder if he's taking longer due to being afraid to screw up. Maybe its all about him, but it could include worry about you.
In terms of the girls, maybe pursue what works - you remaining positive and acting like the kind parent. Tell him its so much easier for you to plan for them and make their time nicer when you know in advance. Maybe its time to start off slow, like monthly regular visits, then every two weeks. Scheduled and predictable, in a way that would benefit him as well - giving him a break that he knows is coming.
Not sure if any of this makes sense. Hang in there, Jo.
