I try to act 'as if' but also if I have questions I want to be able to ask them, because I didn't all the other times and he didn't respect me because he thought I would just agree to whatever he wanted.
That's why I am more direct with him if something concerns me.
But I should have been more light hearted about it. And you're right. It's definitely a trust issue. Because he has repeatedly left and come back, I want to make sure he's staying this time.
I THINK he's sincere, as he said it all very gently and in a really thought out way and he was holding my hand the whole time and saying this time it is different, I still want you etc etc.
I've got to find a way of trusting that he's telling me the truth - because then I wouldn't mind. It's not really the ML at all. I can go without that for the time being, it's learning how to enjoy this R without looking over my shoulder all the time.
