This is oh so true about the OW or at least I have found that in my case. As for H's saying they need space and don't bug me yadda yadda, I too have heard all that before although with me I reached a place where I was at peace with not being with H. I was ready to drop the rope completely.
Even though I still loved him, I didn't love the back and forward between me and OW so I basically told him I was withdrawing for good. Well guess what, that worried him so much b/c he didn't want me out of his life that he finished with OW and we are trying to piece our M back together. Don't know if it will work or not but at least this time it might be a mutual decision if it doesn't work. Basically just wanted to say ditto to you two girls.
I like your new attitude YoYo keep it up and you will do fine....KDU
