"I could try, and I think I did, but it will never be good enough" "I know I am a bad person" "I hate myself" "I can't give you what you need"
Etc.
While I realize they don't mean this as such, it is a form of 'pitty blackmail'. For example, convo: - "I would like it when you get home to have 5 or 10 minutes of being together and affection before you grab your laptop" - "You see? I can't give you what you need"
This is a sure road where she'll eventually have you saying something as in 'it's not good enough' eventualy.
Cap1: - "Yes, you can" - "But you tell me it's not good enough" - "I don't say that, I am saying how I want it better" - "So what you say is that it is bad now"
Cap2: - "No, it's more than good enough. I love and respect how you meet all my needs. Sorry, I was a bit selfish there, I know how much you like to be on the computer" - "Thanks." *kiss* *grabs laptop and is 'out of there'
I do call it pity blackmail as the person dwells in their own negativity, and I would say they expect to be soothed. I am not sure if it is a concious / defensive / evasive strategy. Anyway, I have told her that next time she turns any talk that way, that I will be out of the door for the rest of the day/evening and most likely to return late and drunk.
