I'm sorry this has happened. Just think of it as a flash in the pan, so to speak. I think she's taking your parenting and finances for granted and I think you are letting your resentment get to you.
Just think to yourself, which is more important, getting what you need (peace and sanity) or being right?
At the end of the day, it doesn't matter which one of you is right or wrong. If you feel taken for granted, simply DON'T be there as much and then she will learn she CAN'T do it. You are letting her hurt you. She will respect you more if you're not there for her all the time.
As well as this, by taking the bait in an argument, you are only making yourself feel bad and upsetting yourself.
In my sitch, I could get upset about OW and LOADS of things he's done but if I invested my energy into that, I would make myself miserable, and you know what, I love me more than that and I deserve to be happy so I let the resentment go in order to let the positive in.
Even if I never get my family back, I will at least be content and not bitter about stuff, because I have protected ME. And this is what you need to do more, get that self-love and self protection going more than it is.
