Reading the 5LL is on our list of things to do, but in the meantime, I'll let him baby me and make sure I express my appreciation. Does that mean he's a WOA man?
Usually the idea is that someone shows you love in the language they want love to be shown to them. So in this case he's showing you Acts of Service. But Anna made a good point not too long ago which fits with what you're thinking; someone may well show love as AOS in order to get WOA.
Could you think on something if you get time and see if you have any ideas?
Heh. I'm in a bit of a mood tonight, so brace yourself a bit 'cause you're about to get both barrels. After you read this you may think I'm in a randy mood, but it's more like the great philosopher Tom Cruise once said..."Sometimes, you just gotta say WTF."
Okay, here goes. With one disclaimer: you will not at all hurt my feelings if you don't want to take any advice I ever offer, especially this. Okay, now here goes, really. The only thing a man likes more than sex is feeling sexually desirable. So over the course of the next few weeks, seduce him a handful of times. I'm not talking about over the top seduction; no need for leather and lots of mirrors. More like bedroom eyes, touching your face, caressing his arm, changing into something low-cut, etc. Probably you don't need any advice from me! Move slowly, and when he starts to respond, ask him in a teasing way to tell you the things you want to hear, whatever they might be. "Do you love me?" "Am I lovely?" "How was your day?" And make him give you a decent answer. If he doesn't, back off a little. Not so much he feels threatened, just enough to make it clear it's going to take longer to get to what he wants unless he starts giving you what you want.
With a little luck, he'll start to see that giving intimacy the way you want it is as important as receiving intimacy the way he wants it. Hopefully it won't become just a way for him to try to get sex. But I think if he gets used to it, he won't feel threatened by opening up and talking. And that'll make both of you feel more intimate and giving without the crutch of a little trickery. The goal would be for him to come up to you some day after work, walk up behind you, put his arms around you, and say in a sexy voice, "I almost wrote a check on your account today...but I didn't!" Then you could say, "Oooh, that makes me tingly!" You don't want to merely trade sex for talk, you want to build intimacy by being a little vulnerable and appealing to his strength.
Does that make any sense?
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Move slowly, and when he starts to respond, ask him in a teasing way to tell you the things you want to hear, whatever they might be. "Do you love me?" "Am I lovely?" "How was your day?" And make him give you a decent answer. If he doesn't, back off a little. Not so much he feels threatened, just enough to make it clear it's going to take longer to get to what he wants unless he starts giving you what you want.