Got the snuggles, missed the movie!

Is there a specific issue that you want to raise with him? If so, then maybe schedule a time (with an end time) to talk it over.
Golly.. no, there isnt a specific issue! Well, there are issues, but they are things that I've decided to wait out anyway because they involve him taking the initiative. And since I've dropped the rope on prodding him or reminding him of what needs to be done I'm not going to mention them. Right now, any attempt by me to get him moving in a direction might be seen as control by him. And any negativity is seen as me not giving him credit for what he IS doing. I've learned that the hard way! I guess the issue is that we are supposed to be talking regularly (we're using a conference table process suggested by the MC). And, H doesn't ever mention that we should have a conference table. Even if we don't discuss our R, there are issues we could talk about with the kids, finances, etc. And doing that with issues that aren't hot topics might help us to develop our communication skills for when we really need them in the future. Gonna have to be patient!

But in your M, will talk achieve this? Or will behaviours? You two certainly seem to be behaving your way to a loving R. Must it be talked about for the sake of talking?
You are brilliant Anna! And very right! Maybe part of my disappointment comes because the constant R talks became a habit.. a bad habit, but it connected us emotionally. We are interacting much more positively, but I think I'm craving the emotions that the R talks created. Gonna have to keep on behaving and recognize the level of contentment that's creating. I know for a fact that H feels much closer and more emotionally attached the last few days. He mentioned that tonight. He keeps saying how much closer we're getting. I feel like we're distancing because we're not talking, but he's feeling intimacy because he's starting to feel safe again. And you're right about men and introverts. I always think H isn't sharing what he's thinking and wonder.. but I need to learn that if he appears to be happy and peaceful, he is. Unlike me, his mind isn't going a mile a minute on 15 different subjects! What you see is what you get with him most of the time. I need to get secure with that.

You two seem to be doing so well, I just hope you can appreciate the positives in your sitch without derailing your efforts at building your marriage with efforts to "work on" your marriage.

Again, thank you. You are so insightful. Im gonna print this out and post it somewhere in plain sight! I need to quit worrying us into a crisis. We're doing just fine!

I wish so many great things for you Anna... I read your thread and see how you're making so many positive changes. Thank you for taking your time to post your thoughts, encouragement and advice. It's helped! (as I'm here typing alone too) Watching H veg out and watch ESPN.