, some one send me an oxygen tank!!. Taking VERY deep breaths.....ahhhhh..hmmmmm.....ok now ODing too much oxygen....j/k Maybe I need a good three stooges slapping when I get all emotionally crazy like that, seriously.

You went without contact for 4 months!! thats brave, the longest we've gone is one week, and it nearly killed me. The excuses for contact are diminishing, there is not a lot of business left so I know the day will come when I am going to GDrk for a long time, that will be the true test.

You know, I track on Outlook Calendar everytime there is contact, and I was just looking over it. This past week we talked on Monday twice, Wendsday for about 20ms, Saw him Thursday for about 25mns, and talked for about 10 on Friday. Wow, that is alot considering the situation.

Also about two weeks ago I call him early in the morning biting his head off over possible OW, and that night he calls me "just to see what I am doing" and we had one of our longest talks (1 hr) and best talks, what gives. I really thought that day he was never going to call me again.

Anywho, I would like to visit his grandmother again ,but his mom has not called me and I thought she would make some kind of contact after my self and my family went to visit a week ago. I think I might call to ask if I can visit, I hope they know there is not another agenda then just that of my sincere concern for his grandma.

I made a conciense decision to let go, because I don't think there is nothing I can do to bring him back, he has to want it, I can't force it. It is though to tell yourself this, I cried when I did. But I guess is a first step in healing.

BTW, You all know how when you have so much to tell the WAS and you cant they tell you write it but don't send it. Why not start a thread for that, that way we actually have an audience.