Take a deap breath, and relax..... This IS the cycle we all go thru. I was there a few months ago - no hope, trying to move on. It is all part of the process.
Now, your XH wants to be friends. I know this hurts, becasue, you guessed it, I have been told the same thing. When YOU are ready, try it. Do little things together - no R talks!!! ( I know, I need to follow my own advise here )
Don't focus on if there is OW or not. This won't help YOU. Step back, and cut the contact down between you both. Let his new life set in a bit. Allow yours to set in too. If you are around each other too much, it is no different for him.
Let go, as hard as this is. Everything will happen in time - for you and him.
This may sound mean, or "easy for you to say". I am living this same nightmare as you. I had NO contact for over 4 months. I only recently forgave her, no I am doing much better. She still isn't ready to do things as friends yet. We are all going at different paces. Time is the only thing that will help, one way or another...
Take time for you right now. We all ride this roller coaster.
M: 35; Together 14 years - married 5.5 no children Bomb 22-JAN-2005; D a few months later First real relationship post D just ended ( 7 months ):(
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