I've been reading about these interactions and trying to figure out how to say what I wish to add without coming across as an a$$ or stepping on your happiness. But you are a big boy and know I wish nothing but the best for you and everyone here. That said, I am compelled (my addiction) to offer my analytical perspective.
Maybe it is just me who is confused and this is a distinct possibilty, but aren't you divorced? Didn't she want out of the marriage? Weren't you and your kids horrible to her kids? Wasn't this a HUGE sticking point of the M?
Why does she allow her son to spend the night if you are your kids don't treat him and the others fairly? Why are they there what seems to be a fair amount?
Why is she calling all the time? And coming by and spending hours there? And doing work around the house? And why is she at the house when you are not there?
I guess I am completely missing something. But I thought she wanted out of this deal?
My feeling for whatever it is worth, is you guys have never really been divorced, separated or apart from each other. Wasn't the D final within the last six months?
There was no transistion for either of you from married to separated to divorced to single. You were pursuing her, now she is pursuing you. There has been no long (I mean months even weeks) of no contact, no calling, no talking several times a day, no seeing each other, no invites, no intiating.
Sure, you said you were not going to, but . . .
From the outsiders viewpoint and I have only your version, there has been no divorce.
Clearly you love this woman and she loves you and in some non-traditional method you are finding each other again and this is ultimately what you want.
But I worry and by your own admission you are falling into the same place again.
