There's s/t very significant in her asking you to check her for lumps. My take? She's truly scared about possible cancer, trusts you to be there for her, yet doesn't quite want it to be seen as a sexual contact b/t the two of you. It may boil down to attention, but try to filter your needs out when this topic comes up, give her undivided attention, and be as loving and kind as you can be. Let her take the lead on anything more, as she seems to expect that you'll cross that boundary.
BTW, that's a huge compliment - that of all the folks in her life, you're the one she seeks to help her address this scary possibility. I'm guessing that her choice of you is a big PMA booster.
At some level, in a cloudy, mixed up way, she may be taking that boundary-crossing as disrespect rather than as a positive. Her 'aha' may have more to do with "Wes is still thinking about himself in sitches like this rather than about me" more so than "I still got him on the hook."
