Quote: Would you want to know the honest play by play if you were my current H? Should I tell? Or should I work things out in my own head and then let him know once I have figured it out?
Honestly? If you were my wife and through soul searching and a counselor you were able to figure out you wanted to stay with me, I wouldn't want to know how close you came to leaving me for your XH. BUT, if you are determined to leave him I think you need to level with him. If there is a chance you will stay then I think keeping it for a bit is okay.
ML, I'm very concerned that your XH's motivation, whether he knows it or not, is driven by wanting what he can't have because you remarried. Guys seem to be driven strongly by that urge. When exactly did he start wanting you back? Before you remarried? Before this other man came along? I could be wrong. Maybe he realizes what he's lost and as you say he's changed and is not the man that divorced you. Maybe you should ask him flat out.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
