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...There is still the trust issue too - just can't shake it, and he ain't doing anything to earn it back. I guess I'm just going to have to be patient. It's just that I feel so unattractive, and unsexy, since my H doesn't deem me worthy of romantic pursuit ... This piecing business is not easy!


I'm there with you about the trust issue. I've dropped the constant snooping, if I do now look at something it isnt' morbid curiosity but just to wonder how he was feeling at the time. I will make like Indiana Jones and step in faith into the unknown, I am putting myself on the line and have decided to trust him, if there is something iffy I'll bring it up and take his word, otherwise I don't think we'll reconnect.

My H is the same, though he does innitiate now and then I'm the one who innitiates most times (so it sort of paid off, he never used to). He isn't affectionate at all though, and it hurts, but I have to remind myself that we are going back to square 1 on our feelings, that he's told me he doesn't want to fake it and wants to give me true affection. Also my H has a one track mind and his studies at the academy are taking up all his time, in a way I am second on the list and have accepted that at some degree.

Wish he would romance me somehow, anyways, but it isnt' going to happen, so I just try to enjoy our time together, our movie night alone, our mornings in bed. I also thought he was obsessed with OW and tha'ts why he wasn't interested in me. Long ago told me ML w/m didnt' feel the same, then last sunday said he felt ashamed after what he'd done, and yes, depression also is a huge factor. LEt's give this guys more time to find themselves BeingMe.

In the meantime, look in the mirrow and say "I'm hot!" love yourself inside and out.

Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2

30something
2kids
survivor of S, MLC, A, D
I have peace in my heart, at last.