Well - it's been 12 hours and not a word. Very unusual - normally he would return an e-mail or a phone call very promptly. Either he was out of town today (although I don't think so because I saw him this morning and he didn't mention going out of town), or he read it and wants to tell me that he's totally over me and I'm a loser - but he doesn't want to hurt my feelings, or he read it and he doesn't know how to respond because he agrees with me that he isn't totally sure that this is over, but he's got the complication of op.

How's this for cool ... today I found a 4 leaf clover. I always look for them, but I've never found one - and today I did. I am stoked.

It symbolises for me that whatever happens with H, it will be lucky. Maybe I'll be like NYS and lose this marriage only to find my soul mate in the future, maybe my personal legend is waiting around the corner and it's something that I have to do alone ... there are so many reasons why maybe my marriage may not be meant to be ... but there is also the possibility that maybe it might work ... oh, goodness, it's too much to hope for.

Ok, OK, back up. Zero expectations.

Thank you all for your support. It's a tough time, but made tolerable with your support and encouragement. Cheers, Virginia (formally known as Walkingback)

V

Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.