While DBing is a great guide for us. It is also only that a guide for us. We sometimes have to also instill a bit of our own methods into the guide. Like finding out where we stand and if our efforts are getting us anywhere. If not we face the risk of standing still forever.
I don't think a year of not knowing if things are any better is what DB'ing is about. I would venture into that almost year void not to far but far enough to see if there may be any trace of light at the end of the tunnel. How else does one know if they need to make variations and changes to what they are doing in effort to improve there sitch. I am not talking having a needy whinny whimpy conversation. I am talking you know I am at a place that I need to figure out how to plan/proceed with my future. And where you fit in with that if at all. I will need some input from you to help decide that aspect. So if you could give it some thought and let me know some time with in the next few weeks we could then sit down and discuss things type conversation. If your spouse is sure they want out you will no it. If your spouse seems hesitant to say they want out then you know something is still holding them to you. A year is a long time for someone to be given to decide. I do not think DB'ing is to be used to avoid closure. There are some here that have been doing it for years? I think it is about making sure you try. It is about showing you how to. But it is not suppose to be about living the rest of your life waiting for your spouse to see you have changed while they are out living there life.
