H called in yesterday afternoon - after the lunch - with a couple of ski jackets for D to take to the snow with her today. She had decided to come and stay with the boys and I an extra night so she could catch up with her brothers. (She's 6 months pregnant so 1. Her own ski jacket doesn't fit her and 2. I'm going to be a grandma before I'm a mother .... )

The kids were all out and I was on my way to my sisters so I had a quick chat with H. He filled me in on some gossipy stuff, we finalised arrangements to take RFD13 to the school induction on Tuesday evening. He kind of hesitated leaving, but there was nothing left for us to talk about and I was trying to act mysterious about where I was going - on his way out the door though he said "Are you going to dinner at sister's" and I was caught out so I said yes, and he admitted daughter told him (so at least they were talking about me - hopefully in front of OP )

He hesitated again as if he was going to kiss me, but he didn't and then he left.

I proceeded to have dinner with sis, her husband and their perfect little boy - had a great night.

Here's the sad part. I drove home at about 8.30 and noticed in the car park at the pub next door to my place was one car - Hs. I thought to my self what in the world would he be doing there alone at 8.30pm on a Sunday night? I went into our house and there were his/our three beautiful children, my stepdaughter's partner and the dog all sitting around eating a lasagne they'd made together and talking and laughing. I sat with them and had a glass of wine - it was lovely. I realised what H was doing. It's what he always did when we had problems - he's staying away from home - his new home - by being at the pub as late as he can possibly be. Probably drinking too much and definately thinking too much. Where next door, the place he's now not "allowed" to go, his family are spending time together loving each other.

I felt sad for him, the kids, me and even OP. This situation is hurting everyone in it and none of us know how to fix it.

When I went up to bed at about 10pm his car was gone. I guess he finally went home.

V

Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.