Walking Back, that is a lot to go through. I guess we all have doubts, and some days want to chuck it all in. I know I am up and down all the time (sometimes 4 seasons in 1 day ). The thing to remember is that she is competing against you and your history together with H. It is so hard to deal with all the insecurity of not knowing what will happen or what to do. For me that is one of the benefits of DBing, it does give me some sort of stability.
Hang in there, you are doing so well: keep riding the rollercoaster!