Learning to trust myself II

[Burgbud]

Except maybe in time he will want to be my friend. But my guess is he would say he's being my friend now (or at least as much of a friend to me as I am being to him-there's tracy-logic ).

I told Steff that someone on the board had latched on to "tracy-logic" and was going to use it by that name. She laughed 'til she cried. So that was twice this weekend I made her laugh!


This is where I get confused. For me, the feelings can die? But for every other WAS on this board, they are just hiding, running, deluded, selfish....you get it. Why do I get to be so lucky??

Stop me if I'm wrong, but the difference is you still wish it would work. If Matt made the changes that many folks on this board have made, and if he started filling up your emotional tank rather than draining it at every opportunity, you'd be happy to hold up your end, at least until now. That's a significant difference. Don't underestimate yourself. Don't guilt yourself into sticking with something unhealthy for you.

I don't think I've ever blamed Steff on these boards or elsewhere for walking away. I blame her for some other sh1tty stuff she's pulled, like sleeping with Om the night I took the boys househunting and before she'd even managed to drop the bomb. And several things since then. But her love for me died honestly, it's just a shame she is utterly closed to seeing if it can be brought back to life. OTOH, if I haven't really made the changes I think I have, there's no compelling reason for her to come back to me, either. And you're in the same boat she was; if anything your sitch is a little worse. So I don't think you're getting the benefit of the doubt over everybody's WAS. People are on your side because it's the right side to be on.