Learning to trust myself II

[heatherg]

Journaling:

Having a great day today. I told my kiddy cats we could do whatever they wanted and S4 said he wanted to stay home and play. He has a ton of toys, more than any boy could want lol, but I gotta say he plays with *all* of them. Like his dad, he is a true toy conniseour (sp?). You get the picture. He helped me clean up his room today. Ok, well he played while I cleaned his room. Believe me, it wasn't a task to bestow on a four year old I gathered one huge bag to give away and one huge bag to throw away. I tell ya, those McDonald's happy meal toys pile up faster than one might imagine...ahem, especially as often as we go.... Hey, they have apples now instead of fries and milk instead of Hi-C, so they're not as bad as they used to be....
So anyway, it's been a productive day. I was thinking that if H was here, he would have been playing with the kids while I cleaned. That would have irritated me. Weekend mornings are not good for H and I b/c it is my time to clean and his time to sleep or play or.....you get it.
But if he's not here, the cleaning feels great. I love it. I love a newly picked up and vacuumed house. So, I suppose when he's here and doesn't help, I feel resentful. Very resentful. Guess I need to work on that. Focus more on the fact that I like to do it, I like the outcome and forget that he's being lazy, er, I mean productive in some other wonderful way.

So after cleaning, we went to the madhouse. No, not Wal-Mart. The other madhouse, aka Costco. A madhouse today in particular b/c they have good gas prices. I spent $144. If you don't want to spend money, don't go to Costco. I love that place. Got lots of yummy things to eat.

And now kids are watching Spiderman and I'm about to make dinner. Cheeze ravioli and texas toast. No, not Chef Boyardee, I know I said I frequent McDonalds, but you don't have to keep referring back to that!