Learning to trust myself II

[Burgbud]

Now that I see the definitions, perhaps I shouldn't be so offended?

Erk. I don't wanna write this post.

In "old me" world (and maybe in new me world, gotta think about that one), "irrational" is about the worst thing I could call you. If you're irrational it means I don't have to listen to you. There's no reason for me to even consider what you're saying because it's irrational. And it means we should obviously do things my way because I'm rational and you're not.

There is no shortage of examples of me doing this to Steff. One is the getting up with the baby rationalization I mentioned in a post somewhere. Why should I wake all the way up in the middle of the night, go get the baby and bring him to her to feed? She has to get up anyway, right? The only reason we both should have to get up is if she's just trying to make things even with me. Otherwise, isn't it beneficial for at least one of us to have gotten a full night's sleep?

She eventually started calling this "Tracy-logic". And still does, as far as that goes. If it sounds good and seems to be logical but is actually bullsh1t, then that is Tracy-logic. She and I occasionally disagree on whether or not it actually is bullsh1t, but I am willing to listen to her now and at least consider what she's saying. And much to my surprise and chagrin, if I think about it for awhile before forming my opinion on her ideas, she's right a lot of the time. She's actually pretty smart. (Though in some area of our current life I would still maintain she's a bit irrational.)

It might also be helpful to note that to old-me, "irrational" and "emotional" might as well be the same word. If you make an emotional decision that means you considered more than just the facts so you weren't in a position to make the best possible decision. Emotional == irrational. Coming from me, both those words were a pejorative (heh, I always wanted to use "pejorative" in a sentence...).

So you can still validate his perception, but in my opinion you won't be well served to minimize his use of the term "irrational". Sorry.