Learning to trust myself II

[Burgbud]

It was an emotional moment to witness my father behave more graciously than my H was able to muster. I was proud of him.

Cool!


I had an interesting conversation with my sister yesterday...

Give her time. She may feel differently by November (or December). At the very least she'll be more willing to listen to how you feel about being put on the spot by this.


Do these facts change how you all view my situation as well?

I don't think you were misleading about it earlier. It was just very easy for me to focus on "just a kiss" given the nature of my W's PA. And while the reality is more complicated than the Accidental Affair idea behind "just a kiss", it strikes me that makes it more of a wake up call for H. It wasn't just lack of impulse control. Although you really did very little with it, the level of involvement shows there was clearly something you were looking for that you weren't getting in your M. It's one thing to just get mad and pissy about one kiss, but (easy for me to say since I'm immersed in this world right now) when there's a little more pursuit than that, it's time for some soul searching and some problem solving. I don't believe he thinks you're just an untrustworthy person. I think he's scared of looking at his role in all this. My suggestion would be that he start working on himself now while you still want this to work.

I hope he listens but I'm not sure he can hear me from here, even if I SHOUT REALLY LOUD!