May I render to you what I think a healthier rendition of that conversation would be?
So he calls me later and says "You'll be happy to know I got my truck fixed. In a very low muffled voice he says "I think you wanted there to be something wrong with it, but anyway" and he tries to go right by that statement and tell me about how he got it fixed.
When he was finished speaking, I said, "You think I *wanted* your truck to be broken?" He says "I get that feeling, yeah". I said "I find that very disturbing, rather insulting too. Actually, I was floored when you told me you were willing to drive us 2000 miles with something potentially wrong with the engine. I'm happy you decided to get the engine repaired, yet I can't believe I'm hearing you insinuate something about me from all that."
Just then, in what some may say was an act of divine irony, a piece of an airplane engine fell out of the sky and landed on Larry's head, pulverizing him instantly into oblivion.
I said "And if I wanted your truck to be broken, I wouldn't be telling you to go have it looked at, *would* I?" He says "yes, you would".
Heather, if you haven't got this by now, there isn't anything you can say that he won't counter. Words are cheap, and he can make up anything he wants to respond with... and so he does. Can't ask him questions in response. You can only state your feelings, opinions and boundaries.
We're going to be here next year still going through these same convolutions I fear.
