Cally, Sorry to see in the position you are in. People can say things that are based on feelings and feelings change so don't close this chapter of your life. The next chapter is not written yet.
You will need emotional support no matter what happens. Maybe someone to talk to and say what do you think. Please let us on the forum be part of that process. A potential D does not disqualify you from posting when you are ready to move forward.
In the mean time (((((((((( Cally )))))))))), yes 10 out of 10 huggs to you.