Quote: Is there anything your H could do that would show you he can change? Can you at least give him an ultimatum?...Is there possibly one play left?
I honestly don't think there is . I've thought about this myself, and I can't find any other way to make H see how he needs to change. I know I can't control him; only he can do that....but he can't even refrain from calling me a b**** when he gets angry with me....I remember the first time he said that, I told him he'd better not ever do it again, and he said he wouldn't. Well, now it's, "I'm not saying you are one. You're just acting like one," or "I wouldn't call you one if you didn't have it coming. You bring it upon yourself."
So...should I call him an a**hole then? A jerk? A d**k? No, of course not....but he sure does act like one .
It's not just the name calling either. It's everything I've had to endure over the years, but the total lack of respect H has for me is big.
I don't think there's anything H could do to have me believe that he could ever change.....The damage has been done, and he can't repair it or make up for it. I really feel it's too late.
JV
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination."
Valerie
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination." ~ author unknown
. I've thought about this myself, and I can't find any other way to make H see how he needs to change. I know I can't control him; only he can do that....but he can't even refrain from calling me a b**** when he gets angry with me....I remember the first time he said that, I told him he'd better not ever do it again, and he said he wouldn't. Well, now it's, "I'm not saying you are one. You're just acting like one," or "I wouldn't call you one if you didn't have it coming. You bring it upon yourself." 
No, of course not....but he sure does act like one 
.
