I see little reason why she should come back to you now. She’s got the best of both worlds. If I were her, I might be very happy.
You've touched the very thing that I think about most often. Is what I'm doing only prolonging the current sitch?
At some point you need to get your own life too.
I haven't posted much about what I do when W isn't around. I have slowly been GAL. I have a regular Friday night outing (movie and/or drinks or food) with some friends from work. I also spend time with my B and SIL. Then when I have any other free time I'll hang with my oldtime buddy that I've known since we were 5.
It might put you in a different frame of mind and let her know you can play this game forever.
Funny you should mention this. Just this weekend W backslid a tad. It used to bother her (when I first started DBing) when I would go have a good time with friends. She'd drop the typical, "Wish we could have done that sort of thing in the past." I thought she had gotten over it but it's still there. Friday I was feeling like I wanted to drop the rope completely. But for some reason I tried the cheeseless tunnel one last time when W called about kid logistics. I asked W to go to a movie. I laced the question with all kinds of "it's no bid deal", "if you don't want to I understand" blah blah blah. She didn't say yes and she didn't say no, "I'll think about it", "Let me see how my day goes". I knew that meant no. So I arranged my usual Friday with coworkers schedule and made arrangments for someone to watch the kids. W never got back to me.
While I was out D9 calls me about a homework problem. (Who's kid is this doing homework on a Friday night?) Anyway, D9 says she called W and she wasn't any help. I couldn't help over the phone either and said we could work on it in the morning. D9 insisted on finishing when I got home, which was going to be in about an hour. That is exactly what we did.
The next day (Saturday) W shows up around noonish to take kids to her place. She was angry, quiet, very short, and shed some tears. I didn't ask why. I could make many speculations but I don't really care why. When she couldn't even tell me straight out over the phone that she didn't want to go to a stinkin' movie, that's when the rope hit the floor.
I had S6 to myself over the weekend. One of the other things that is usually buzzing around my subconscious is that OM is never mentioned by anyone. Does that mean he's not around anymore? Well S6 said OM's name about half a dozen times this weekend. "OM has a pancake cooker like ours." "You weigh the same as OM." "Why don't you help BIL and OM with their race car?" It really didn't bother me. More like a relief. Then Sunday I'm picking up the kids at W's and SIL is there. First time I've seen her in months so I got a huge hug from her. When SIL left I had to move my truck out of her way. SIL wanted to talk to me out by our vehicles but W was watching us like a hawk. As SIL drove past me she said a few things about how she didn't understand how W can live a double life, and that I should move on with my life. She couldn't believe that I was still wearing my ring. I was embarrassed. I felt like a fool. A few minutes later the kids and I left for home. W asked if I was mad about something. I just said I was hungry and tired.
Later that night I get a txt msg from W that says "Goodnight everyone!" Usually I reply back nicely. This time I couldn't play the game anymore so I ignored her txt msg. An hour later W called. I chatted nicely just to be polite. The reason I'm being polite is different now. Talking to W feels like talking to my neighbor down the street.
Then I come to work after a nice three day weekend and I read Cobra's post. You read me pretty well, Cobra.
I'll post later on meeting someone interesting. <tease> <tease>
