To sum it up, I'd say that it appears your difficulty with detachment is because you want her romantic, passionate self back, and it's playing on you. You can only control yourself, Guy, so if you can get a handle on that by focusing more on your own self and your own independent life, rather than her and what you'd like to se happen and assuming what she's thinking, she'll likely keep respond by drawing closer.
That's pretty much what I was trying to say in my disjointed rambling way. Wish I could get my thoughts onto my post more clearly within the five minutes of free time I have to type it out.
I don't think about her and the sitch every minute of the day. There are only fleeting thoughts that pop into my head at a stop light, or while waiting for a compile to link, or when I meet W to swap kids from her vehicle to mine. <Poof> Then it's back to the real world.
The more I detach the friendlier W gets and the sexier she gets.
So it's actually causing her to pursue you some all the same.
This is one of the very few things that still causes me a tiny moment of anxiety. Maybe I'm just catching a glimpse of these things, and they are all really directed toward OM? Yes, I know - nothing I can do about it. I want to be confident so I shove the thought out of my mind in an instant.
What is this with you and romance???? Think about this: why are you looking for romance?
Not sure romance is the word I really meant. I just want to be close to someone. I hang with friends and family, and spend tons of quality time with my kids, but it doesn't satisfy my wanting to close to someone. I have learned something here on this board...romance, passion, intimacy, affection, and sex are all very different things. They were always synonymous to me before the bomb. I'd like to put my new found knowledge to use sometime. Preferabley with W.
So detach some more and see what happens. But do put these thoughts (as they become desires for you and serve to frustrate you) on the back burner for now.
That's exactly what I intend to keep doing along with some venting here as usual.
