I am a classic WAW except I haven't left. Was so surprised to have had an affair - never thought I would be there. The A is over. Told my H I wanted to separate in Jan but not about the OM. I am embarrassed. H was shocked and we went for C. It helped somewhat with our interaction with each other but we are still not great. We have weekends when we just don't speak to each other. He thought C was a waste of time. For me it was great because I really learned a lot about myself over the past year. I feel like I have grown quite a bit.
Is it important to tell him about the A? He would never forgive me and we would never be able to get the M back on track. I am not even sure we have something to save. I feel that I am in love with OM but also realise that this could be just a romantic love and not mature love. Which confuses me because I really need and want to connect with my H but we can't (again he is too tired from work, children, etc and would rather watch TV) and so it what I want/need just a fantasy? Is what I felt with the OM not real?
Tried showing him different websites to help us work on ourselves so we can communicate better and find what we are missing but he hasn't the time. What prompted you to find this site? What do you do to make the M better. I have read books, done work on myself, tried to change how I have interacted with H.....what next?
I ask only because I am encourage by what I have read on your thread. You, and those on your thread seem very committed - your posts have given me a lot to think about.
