(How do I have a conversation about the complexities of response to sexual abuse with someone who won't even entertain the idea that Tolkien had more than a childrens story in mind when he wrote Lord of the Rings?)
You have that conversation...because the two things you just compared above are nothing alike. One deals in reality as fact, the other in fantasy compared to reality. One is YOUR history, the other is fiction & entertainment.
I don't mean this to be harsh but the way you wrote that came across to me as sounding as though you don't think he has the intellectual capacity to understand what you need him to. He does, and I'm sure you believe he does....but you need to speak frankly, bluntly, no comparisons, no analogies....tell him the flat out bare-bones facts.
It sounds to me that perhaps he doesn't want to talk about the Lord of The Rings in a deeper sociological way because maybe that ruins the sheer entertainment value of it for him. That's how my H is. I can watch a movie and see the deeper meaning in it at times, but sometimes I also like to just enjoy what I'm watching and let it take me somewhere else....perhaps trying to dissect the movie in that fashion bursts that entertainment/fantasy bubble for him. I can just hear my H say to me sometimes...."Can't you just sit back and enjoy the movie?"
